We’ve all been there, mentally preparing ourselves to gain the courage to ask, and then having to face the dreaded answer ‘no’. Sometimes it seems it is better not ask rather than face the rejection but like everything in life we have ups and downs, highs and lows, good and bad and yeses and no’s. So before asking for something no matter how justified the request may be we have to be prepared for the answer to go both ways. And if we are faced with the displeasing response here are 5 ways to help you deal with them.
Don’t take it personally
Asking for anything puts you in a vulnerable situation and that doesn’t feel nice, if it can be prevented I will try my best to avoid asking for anything at all cost. But then we cannot forget we’re humans and as much as we try to do for ourselves we cannot do everything and at times do end up needing help. So when we put ourselves out there and get faced with a ‘no’, it is upsetting and we end up asking ‘why me?’ But there could be a hundred different reasons behind the ‘no’ and not one of them could be about you.
Prioritising is important.
Just like it is important for you to prioritise yourself, it is inevitable that others will prioritise themselves before you and that is a good thing. Not for you in the short term but if others around you are looking after themselves and prioritising their needs, they are putting themselves first and in the long run improving their relationship with you.
Don’t be disheartened
Maybe the help needs to come from somewhere else and you are being redirected to an even better solution. There are so many success story and most of them are a result of facing rejection and looking elsewhere. Everyone’s journey is unique and no matter how hard we try to move forward, moving forward isn’t as obvious as we think it to be. Forward doesn’t necessarily mean a straight path, there will always be twists, turns and detours, rejection is simply a diversion to a path that’s maybe better suited to you.
Don’t let it change your relationship.
If the reason is genuine and it is not a frequent habit, then see the ‘no’ for what it is and try to move forward. Maybe as hard as it was for you to hear the ‘no’ it could have been just as hard for the other person to say it. Take it in and process it, if you feel sad, upset or angry maybe vent out your frustrations to someone else but don’t let one ‘no’ determine your whole relationship with someone. Nor let a rejection affect the relationship you have with yourself, it is not easy building a relationship you have with yourself, our whole blog is about having a positive ‘self-relationship’ and facing any sort rejection from someone else can start a downward spiral of self-doubt and self-hate. Again try and see the ‘no’ for what it is and don’t make it any bigger, for example if someone cannot go out with you don’t start rethinking your whole relationship with that person is a sham and you are not worthy of having any friends. They are UNABLE to go on ONE trip with you, and that is all.
Look at what you do have, what you can do and what you are surrounded by. No matter how big the ask, it isn’t everything. There is always something you have that you can appreciate and count your blessings for. Most importantly be grateful for you, for you are nothing short of amazing, and no amount of rejection should change that.
I hope you find these points helpful and if there are any other ways you deal with rejection I would love to hear your suggestions.
And as always Reflect. Love. Heal. xXx
Brown Girl R.